On April 28th I was feeling HORRIBLE! My stomach was killing me and I barely ate anything, when I tried to eat dinner I threw up 6 times literally one minute after eating... I of course was totally freaked out and worried that something was wrong and this illness could hurt Logan. I called my Obgyn's answering service and asked for a call back from my doctor. Within about 10 minutes he called and basically told me that this could be my body preparing for labor and clearing out my system. He said if I could keep liquids down then there was no reason to be worried. This was at about 7pm and at 9pm I ate some chicken noodle soup (except I ate none of the chicken LOL). Around midnight I went to bed and told my husband he really should too in case I went into labor overnight. He didn't come to bed until 2am. At 3am I woke up to go to the bathroom and halfway down the hallway felt a huge kick... as I sat down to go to the bathroom I thought "huh, I have read about water breaking and they always talk about a big kick... how funny would that be if my water broke." but I didn't REALLY think it would. Well, I sat down and it happened - There was a gush of water and I knew I hadn't peed LOL so then I'm sitting there going ummmm what do I do because I know that it just keeps gushing once it breaks. SO I manage to get up to get a pad and all and I look in the toilet and the water is brown! So I knew that was NOT a good thing as that meant Logan had passed his meconium while in the womb. So I was slightly terrified by the complications that could arise from that but dwelling would not help any of that so I went into prepare mode and got moving. LUCKILY I had packed everything I could weeks before and hours before had packed everything except pillows, etc. in case labor did happen so I didn't have much to grab. I called the hospital and told them my water broke, the meconium was in the water, and that most likely it would still end up being a c-section given my discussion with my doctor.
At around 3:30 or so I woke my husband up. He is not an easy man to wake up. I was like "Nate! Nathan! BABE! Honey WAKE UP!" Finally he was like "What?" I said "My water broke!" He was like "Huh? REALLY?" he then say straight up and said "WHAT DO WE DO?" lol - I said we get our stuff together and go to the hospital silly!!! Then I told him to get ready and I called my parents. They said they would head out as soon as they got ready. Ten I grabbed my list of the last minute things I needed to grab such as pillow, eye mask, ear plugs, etc.
We got to the hospital at about 4:15am and checked in and then we were sent right on up to the maternity ward. I was taken to a room and given the ever lovely hospital gown and told to change, etc. Then I got in bed and they hooked up an IV - first attempt was unsuccessful because they said I was most likely dehydrated from being so sick the day before.... lucky me - I HATE needles! The second attempt failed and the third finally worked - yikes! I was checked and I was 80% effaced and 2cm dilated. My contractions had been pretty light until about 30 minutes of being in bed then they started to suck big time!!! They very quickly went from like 7 minutes apart to 5 minutes apart and after about an hour to an hour and a half they were 2 minutes apart. In the meantime I would like to mention that my water continued to gush out - seriously the GROSSEST most uncomfortable thing ever!! While the contractions were horribly painful the hot water gushing out every couple minutes was just disgusting and horrible - I HATED IT!!!
So at around 8am they checked to see if there was any progress - there was NONE! Geesh! So the doctor was called. When he came in an hour later he checked and I was more like 4-5cm dilated but the head was not in a good position at all, the baby was face up, and given the meconium in the water there could be added risks. So I was given the option of natural labor continuing or choosing a c-section. I choose a c-section. By 9:30 a catheter was put in - I wasn't overly worried about it because I had a catheter put in before but HOLY CRAP it was not good - needless to say the last time I had it done the person was much better - eek! While that was being done Nate was told to put his suit on over his clothes so he could come into the room for the surgery. My contractions were still every 2 minutes at this point and very very painful - I had basically been in tears for over an hour at that point and was terrified of getting the spinal especially with the contractions I was having! Next I was shaved - not cool - you know how they have electric razors with the attachments etc. for cutting men's hair? Well when there is NO attachment it's just that metal thing... well THAT is what they shaved me with - Yikes! Then they rolled me out of the room and into surgery after a kiss from my hubby.
I was beyond terrified when, after switching to the surgical table they asked me to sit on the edge to get my spinal. Upon sitting up a horrible contraction started and I was crying from pain but also from being terrified that I would get another contraction when they gave me the spinal! Luckily they did a fabulous job and it wasn't bad at all!!! The IV and catheter were way worse! After that I had to lay back down and they quickly strapped down both my arms and hung up the blue "curtain" to block the gory show from my eyes ;) Then I they were pinching me to see if I felt pain...I didn't. I heard them calling for Nate (who had apparently ran back to the room for our camera) and a minute or two later he was sitting by me holding my right hand. The meds made me itchy so it was driving me crazy that I couldn't itch my face. After about (I'm guessing) 15 minutes they pulled the "curtain" down and all I saw was Logan's feet and it was back up - no crying!!! 0 they told Nate to sit down and I guess ran over to the warmer with Logan. Nate and I were both crying at this point and had no idea what was going on - all I kept asking was "is he okay???" Finally Nate said he was and seconds later Logan was screaming bloody murder! I asked what time he was born and they told me 10:19am. They brought him over to see me for the first time and after kissing him a few times he punched me LOL - sassy little bugger takes after his mommy ;)
Nate went to the nursery with Logan while they weighed him, etc. and I got put back together. A nurse came in to tell me he weighed 9 lbs. 3 oz. and was 21 inches long. They gave me Zofran halfway through gluing me up (they glue the incision instead of stitching) because I started feeling nauseous and after what seemed like forever (probably more like 40 minutes) they were blowing up this balloon thing around me and sliding me back to my hospital bed (that was entertaining lol).Then I was wheeled back to my room and before going in saw my parents and my papa looking into the nursery watching daddy and Logan :) At that point I believe it was about 11:30am and they asked if I wanted to see Nate - I said sure - then they said he was still in the nursery so I told them to let him stay with Logan and my papa came in to see me. After that my parents came in and after what seemed like forever and about 12:20 or so Nate wheeled Logan in and I got to hold my son in my arms for the first time. Of course I was bawling - I was so happy - it was SO surreal. I was a mommy and I was HOLDING MY SON! I told him he was beautiful and we had been waiting a long time to see him and that his nana and his siblings in Heaven were so happy he was safe! While pieces of my heart will always be with Riley, Peyton, and Cameron I never would have thought I could ever love someone as much as I love my sweet little Logan. My life changed so drastically in that second that I was handed my son. I feel sometimes that there is not enough room in my chest and that my heart will just burst with all the love I have for him. As I write this he is laying on my chest. Snuggling with him is the best feeling in the world. I never would have imagined he would be so amazingly cute or how massive the amount of love I have for him would be. Also just how much more I love my husband for going on this journey with me and seeing him become and amazing father to our son. I am one blessed mama!
I was in the hospital for 5 days. Logan was admitted the 5th day - and I was allowed to stay with him - because he had jaundice and other then when he was feeding he was under the lights for 18 hours straight. It was awful to barely get to see him but they were nice enough halfway through the day to wheel the incubator into my room so that I could at least SEE him. For the most part my stay was lovely. I had my issues but other than one nurse who decided to push with all her might on my uterus (if I hadn't been screaming in pain I would have literally PUNCHED her) the other nurses were all great. I had issues with the fact that they did not have consistent thoughts on breastfeeding and I believe the "advice" I basically had to take (I mean I couldn't get out of bed so what could I do) is what made breastfeeding not possible :( Logan was a great little latcher but all the nurses (except for a select few) kept telling me I had to let him sleep and let him go HOURS without letting me try to nurse him. At one point they let him sleep for 7 hours! So I truly believe this had a HUGE effect on my milk never coming in. I have since gotten over this but not being able to breastfeed was easily the saddest most upsetting part of my recovery so far. I did everything I was told to though so I do not blame myself for this outcome! He is a content little man even if he does have to be formula fed. His jaundice is almost completely gone at this point and he is doing very well. His little stump fell off his belly button yesterday so we look forward to that healing up and are happy that ugly black stump is gone ;) I will try to update when I can, for now here are some more pictures :) if you made it through the whole story - WAY TO GO :) :) and thanks for caring enough to read Logan's lengthy tale :)